Friday, January 28, 2011

Gondola Gone Wrong

PDA. No I'm not talking about your Personal Digital Assistant. I'm talking about good old fashioned Public Displays of Affection. Some might argue that there is never an appropriate time for PDA, but I disagree . . . slightly. Given the right circumstances (say on the Eiffel Tower) PDA is expected. However, acceptable PDA is completely determined by your age group. 

The Rules of PDA:

  1. If you are under 20, please stop kissing before your braces get stuck together!
  2. If you are over 40, lets keep the kisses under 4 seconds, your kids don't want to see that.
  3. If you're over 65, be careful with your dentures and don't get handsy!
  4. Finally, no one at any age should be making-out in public, it's just awkward.
Animals may show affection at any age
as long as they don't get frisky.

Now that we've laid some ground rules here is the story of Mark and I's most awkward moment together. We were on a gondola ride at the Venetian in Las Vegas. We didn't want to pay extra to ride alone so we sat across from another couple (definitely in the above 40 range). At this point Mark and I were in love and talking about getting married, but even we weren't as clingy as this couple. They were all over each other. It was so distracting, I could hardly enjoy the fake scenery of Venice. 

We managed to pry them apart for a few seconds so we could asked them to take a picture for us. We just wanted a quick snap shot, instead we got kissing lessons. The couple insisted that we take a picture of us kissing. We figured it couldn't hurt right? Wrong. They coached us through the whole ordeal. What should have taken 30 seconds, took 3 minutes! 

"Tilt you head a little more . . .  there you go that's it! . . . " 

So awkward. Mark and I were all to glad to get off that gondola. The gondolier was nice though. His name was Giuseppe and he sang us beautiful Italian music whilst we watched in horror, suffering through the excessive PDA that sat before us. 


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